Oh David. My dear, sweet David. What hast thou done? It’s been years now since thy mustache has departed, and we’ve seen no return. Such a glorious mustache should be embraced, cherished and dare I say.. worshipped by the people Grabagun Heavy R,
A mustache of your calibur should be appreciated. I would walk across burning coals to just witness one more glimpse of what has become known as the greatest mustache known to man.
From humble beginnings, our Lord David travelled from New York to Chicago, where he was able to find his true identity. And with this identity came great power. From lowly beginnings as an intern at the Chicago Tribune, David went on to become the Chief Strategist for Obama. Unfortunately for Obama, he was unable to grow a mustache of David’s quality, though we don’t condemn him because of that. Not every man can sport a mustache, though David is one of those rare cherries on the tree that can justify a great lip warmer. He definitely checked out some nose hair trimmer reviews, because his nose is always extremely fresh.
Whilst David might not have been the most popular whilst he was supporting Barack, we ask you; does that even really matter? Does it really matter if a person is shady when they are as handsome as the Axe? No. It doesn’t matter at all. If I haven’t convinced you yet, check out this hilarious joke from David live on air! Har har David you jokester!
In respect to David, I have produced a short poem in his honour. Please, don’t judge me;
If there’s one man, I’d wish to meet
It would not be Trump, or Obama
Though powerful men that have been
I’d rather meet someone much calmer
He’d have to be a strategic man
Someone who was not a nimrod
Of course I’m talking
About David Axelrod lol
Thanks for all you’ve done Mr Axelrod.